When your body speaks louder than your voice

Do you know the book When the Body Says No by Gabor Maté?

I love it and just the title alone says so much.

Over the years, I’ve heard variations of the same story in many different places; socially, at business networking events, on the tennis court, during conversations with potential clients and from friends.

And although the details differ, there is a common thread.

Many people don’t realise how much stress they’re carrying because they’re still functioning.

For instance, the woman who tells me she hates her job. She didn't say 'I find it stressful' or 'I could do with a holiday', she said she truly hates it.

Every Sunday evening, her stomach tightens and on Monday morning, she switches on her computer with a clenched jaw.

In theory, she knows what she could do; she has updated her CV several times and her partner has encouraged her to hand in her notice. She even says herself: 'I know this isn’t good for me.'

And yet, two years later, she is still in the same situation.

“I didn’t realise how much tension my body was holding until I tried TRE. After a few sessions, I feel calmer, sleep better,

and my nervous system isn’t running on overdrive anymore.”

Simon

Another person tells me he longs to be more present with his family. He wants to come home and enjoy the evening with his children instead of feeling depleted and irritable.

He has read the books, listened to the podcasts and understands the importance of work-life balance – intellectually.

At half past eight, he gets off the commuter train exhausted, carrying the day in his shoulders, nervous system and mood.

"TRE has given me a way to reset my body

when stress builds up.

I feel more grounded, less reactive,

and I finally know what it means to have a regulated nervous system.”

Steph

Recently, someone else shared that she had been experiencing ongoing pain and fatigue for years.

Countless appointments, tests and check-ups later, they were told there was 'nothing obvious wrong'.

And while that can be great news as it means there's nothing seriously wrong from a medical point of view, it can also feel deeply frustrating, because the symptoms are still there and one feels dismissed or not taken seriously.

These experiences are filed under MUS – Medically Unexplained Symptoms – and stress, overwhelm or emotional strain are 'blamed' or recognised as contributing factors.

Relaxation techniques might be recommended – and even explored and tried.

Often they are being ignored 'no time for that' and people continue carrying on while wondering why they don't feel like themselves anymore.

The body is communicating. First it might just be a whisper, over time it can turn into a shout.

As I always say:

I want to stress and encourage everybody who is experiencing symptoms or health concerns, to speak with their GP first.

Health is rarely just physical or just psychological.

"I was seeing my GP and many specialist

who run all the tests.

All good.

I felt nobody believed me.

And I was still in pain.

Since I started my TRE practice,

I feel much better and my pain has eased."

Alexandra

Body and mind are deeply connected and increasingly we are beginning to understand how chronic stress, emotional suppression, hypervigilance and nervous system overload can affect the body over time.

This is why I believe working with the body is so important.

I see highly capable, intelligent, caring people who already know what they 'should' do, whether that's asking for support as their workload is unsustainable or change their situation radically with a new job or a different lifestyle.

I appreciate that knowing something intellectually and feeling safe enough in the body to change things are not always the same thing.

Sometimes the nervous system has been in survival mode for so long that slowing down feels uncomfortable, if not unsafe.

And often we become so used to tension that we hardly notice we are holding it, because it's 'normal'.

As I often say:

The body communicates. Always.

And this might be through tightness, fatigue, pain, overwhelm, anxiety, insomnia or emotional patterns like anxiety, irritability or anger.

The body isn't working against us, it's constantly trying to communicate, protect and support us and our health and well-being.

If we choose to listen, that is.

This is one of the reasons I love TRE so much, to me it's the most innate stress release modality and – most importantly – it works with the body rather than against it.

Instead of analysing every thought or forcing ourselves to 'push through', TRE invites the body to release tension, which has often been held over years if not decades, and when the body relaxes physically, it also regulates the nervous system.

I'm sure you've experienced it after a massage. When the therapist was 'only' working on your body, i.e. physically, but you felt deeply relaxed afterwards.

That's very similar to TRE and clients often describe feeling lighter, calmer, deeply relaxed, less reactive and more in their body after a TRE session.

And interestingly, when the body feels safer, clearer and less overwhelmed, decisions can become easier too, not because someone tells you what to do, but because you can finally hear your inner voice underneath the noise and survival response.

TRE is not a quick fix or a magic wand and it is not a replacement for medical care, but it can most certainly become a supportive and empowering tool where you can work with your body instead of constantly overriding it.

And ideally, your body doesn't need to shout any longer.

If you recognise yourself in this situation, my invitation is not to judge yourself for not having taken action, yet, but to be curious about what your body might be trying to tell you.

And I also invite you to reach out for an informal conversation to explore how and if TRE can support your health and well-being.